#42 Consummation – The Sixth Link of the Chain of Seduction

Hello beautiful people, my name is Athol and this is The Chain of Seduction. Today we are up to Consummation, the final link in The Chain of Seduction.

I know this feels like we are reaching the goal of getting to the sex. Like that’s what we’ve been focusing on, this is where we’re trying to be. It’s true on one level and it’s not true on another. On one level, yes, we’ve been going through The Chain of Seduction in this linear process. We’ve made sure we’ve passed the Physical link. We’ve made sure we’ve passed the Attraction and the Comfort and the Energy and the Initiations and here we are at the finish line, the Consummation link. It’s very much true for the first time you’re having sex with someone. It’s very true for the beginnings of a relationship with someone. But if you’re in a long relationship, The Chain of Seduction is far more of a circular process than it is a linear one. The sex is not the goal in a marriage. It’s not the goal in a long term relationship.

What I want you to take away from this video is the sex itself can create a +1 or a -1 moment in your relationship. The sex itself can build the Relationship Momentum or it can start whittling away at it. The sex life that you have is going to be a reflection on the Relationship Momentum, where you’re at. Just like what I talked about yesterday with initiations, you can make a fabulous initiation, but if the Relationship Momentum isn’t there yet, you’re probably not going to have sex. If the relationship’s in a fabulous place, well you can probably give a really weak initiation and you’re still going to get laid.

The goal of the Consummation link is not to get to get to do the sexual end zone dance, but to realize okay this is actually part of a process and I can do things to make the sex better. I can do things to make the sex enjoyable. I can find out the things my partner likes, and I can ensure the sexual experience is good. Doing that will improve Relationship Momentum, and make me more likely to get back to this place in the future.

It’s kind of like going to a restaurant where you know the food is amazing. You go a little easier on some of the other things at the restaurant. You’re not quite so caring that the sign out front is not perfectly clean and new. You don’t care about the wallpaper. You don’t care that the service is a little slow or the people are a little bit rude because the food is amazing. You are prepared to go through some of the stuff to get to the good stuff. Consummation is the cherry that pulls us along and motivates us to do a bunch of this stuff. So don’t freak out about any one sexual experience. You’re just trying to make them generally positive, generally good. Sometimes the worst sexual experiences that you have, turn out to be the best bringing you closer together. At least you tried something. At least you experimented. At least you grew in some way.

So the sex is not the goal, the goal is to increase the Relationship Momentum and the sex can hep with that or it can hinder that.

Anyway, I think that’s it for today.I will come back tomorrow and talk more about the Brands of Sexuality to kind of give you a sense of the flavor behind this stuff and how you can really target what your partner likes and what you like. I hope you like the video. Please like, share, comment, and subscribe, all that good internet stuff, and I will catch you tomorrow.

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